Have you ever wondered what it’s like to be a bald man? Have you ever wondered about the life of a teacher? What about the lives of bald teachers?

At The Interlake Inquirer, we decided to ask some of our bald staff members about their daily interactions at Interlake; we also were curious about the differences between the experiences of Interlake’s bald staff members and those of Interlake’s most luscious-haired teachers.

Here’s the information we got from some of our bald teachers…

Q: What do you think of when you hear the word “bald”?

Mr. O’Byrne: I think of eagles. I actually wrote a story about eagles when I was in 1st grade, so it reminds me of that.

Mr. Alvarez: Eagles.

Mr. Murphy: I think of mirrors. And eagles. The eagles remind me of patriotism.

Q: What is your favorite thing about being bald?

Mr. O’Byrne: It’s easy to wear hats. I don’t have to worry about hat hair. Also, putting on sunscreen and lotion is easy.

Mr. Alvarez: The low maintenance.

Mr. Murphy: The aerodynamics of it.

Q: Do you think students treat you differently because you are bald?

Mr. O’Byrne: It’s a layup for students- an easy roast. But, I think students need to start making their roasts more intellectually advanced. However, for the time being, I’m happy to give students a target roast.

Mr. Alvarez: Yes, they always ask me questions about being bald. But in terms of respect, no.

Mr. Murphy: They make fun of me for something very specific, more than they otherwise would.

…and here’s the information we got from our longer-haired teachers.

Q: How do you feel about the large percentage of bald teachers at Interlake?

Mr. Hutcherson: I think its worrisome. I think it’s something we should question and have deep conversations about.

Mr. Allen: I think that it shows that the Interlake teacher population is getting older. It really goes hand-in-hand with having more Interlake teachers with gray hair. But I’m fine with bald people- to me, hair isn’t a reflection of who the person is.

Q: How often do students ask you about the length of your hair?

Mr. Hutcherson: At least once a day. Once a period. Might be racially-motivated though…

Mr. Allen: Not very often! To me, hair is not really a big deal.

Well, Interlake- it seems like we need to start being kinder to our bald teachers!

Remember, bald people are people too.